Due date.

Today is Jack’s due date.

Seems crazy that our beautiful boy was born, lived for 3 weeks and died all before today. The last few months have been so hard after losing him. The thing is though, as painful as this feels, I would do it over again in a heartbeat if it meant I got to spend time with him again.

To Jack: Can’t believe today is your due date my beautiful boy. Miss you every second Jack ❤️

I hope you are being looked after up there in Neverland. Know that mummy and daddy love you so much. We are so proud of you always. The short 3 weeks that we spent with you were the happiest of our lives. We would do it all over again if it meant having those moments again.

I miss your long legs, just like your dads. I miss you giving us the thumbs up. I miss you putting your middle finger up and swearing at the nurses. I miss you seeing over the incubator. I miss changing your tiny nappy. I miss daddy doing your tube feeds. I miss holding you. I miss your smell. I miss you.

❤️🌟💫👼

Mother’s Day

Thinking of everyone not able to hold their little ones today. I know the heartbreak and pain you are feeling. I know how much it hurts seeing everyone post their gifts and cards from living children. Seeing the love and joy which should have been ours. Whether it’s your first empty armed Mother’s Day like me, or your 50th, know you are and always will be a mum. You are just as valid as any other mum this day.

Unconditional love and care is what makes a mum, not gifts or cuddles. It’s knowing you would do anything for your baby, even if it breaks your own heart.

We are angel mums and we are strong. We can get through this tough day and all others. Our angels are always looking down on us. Until we meet them again ❤️

Mummy loves you Jack, always xxx

Remembering

So Mark and I have started finding a new normal in our lives. Each day has its ups and downs but we are moving further towards being more happy than sad. We have so many beautiful memories of our boy, they keep us going everyday.

We have received our photos of Jack that were very kindly taken by one of the nurses in NICU. They offer a free service for parents where she takes photos of angels after they have passed. This means that parents have some memories of them holding their babies outside of the incubator and medical equipment. I wont post many as some i don’t want to share, but i have a few that are really beautiful.

Please like their page on facebook. It’s such a beautiful thing to do for us parents of angels. Something so so beautiful. We have so few moments to hold our little ones, these pictures capture those moments forever.

https://www.facebook.com/remembermybaby/

– Allana x

Thank you

It’s truly touching how many people have followed Jacks story and ours, how may care. Its been a big comfort to us all throughout our journey. The surge in donations on Friday night was heartwarming and gives us great hope that we will reach our target. We so want to make sure we can give back as much as possible. You are all making that a reality. So thank you from all of us!